France Mistakes I Made so You Don't Have to
As I was getting my haircut for the first time since returning from France my hairdresser exclaimed "Oh no! You have a gray hair!" I don't want to point fingers, but I'm pretty sure France is the culprit of this one. I stressed about everything, and if I can leave you with one life lesson: just chill. France is a convoluted mess sometimes (often), but for some reason it all kind of turns out in the end.
Before Departure
1. Trying to plan anything before arrival
You're going to a new country. You know it's going to be a hot mess. You want to organize beforehand and minimize the clusterfuck. I'm telling you now: You can't. I too researched apartments, banks and phones before my arrival. It's very unlikely someone will rent to a foreigner without ever meeting them (though, it's possible!) and getting a sim card is honestly one of the easier procedures you will have. Right now, enjoy your stress-free time and sit back and relax with drip coffee and stand in a civilized line and eat real Mexican food...while you can.
Honestly, no reason for mushrooms to be here. They just make me think of my first days in France.
Housing
2. Not confirming whether my apartment had electricity ready to be connected at any moment
This isn't something I ever thought I'd need to consider. It's logical to think that an apartment will come equipped with electricity. My apartment had electricity but it was cut-off over a year ago and an electrician from EDF (a company that spawns from the devil himself) needed to come in and reconnect it. It's a simple task in a not so simple country. I waited two weeks for 5 minutes of work on EDF's part. No heat, no light, no fridge, no hot water. This was my welcome to France.
2. b) Getting an electricity plan with a cost estimate
I was so overjoyed about getting electricity that I didn't really pay attention to how it worked. They give you two paying options: a monthly flat rate based on what similar lodgings to yours pay (for example I paid 30 euro/month) and you pay the difference when you cancel your plan, or pay a bi-monthly pay-what-you-use plan. For some reason they only suggested the first option and I didn't know the second was available. I ended up having a nice surprise of 200 euros to pay when I left. Some assistants had to pay over 400! Get option two! It might be painful in the winter, but it's better than crying when you left those last 200 euros for a train ticket.
Me, staring out at my first French apartment. Young and naive, thinking that it had electricity.
3. Taking laundry for granted
I didn't live in a tiny village but the capital of my administrative region. It wasn't huge but big enough to have an H&M. There was not a single laundromat in the whole town. When I went to one in the next town over, it cost 30 euros for 2 loads of laundry and 1 dryer. I don't know how it stays in business because who (except for yours truly) would pay that much? Before getting an apartment, inquire about your laundry options. Maybe even get your own laundry machine on Leboncoin (French craigslist). The one upside is that my arms got very strong from all the hand laundry I had to do. Downside was that my downstairs neighbour was probably over my constant stomping in the bathtub.
Banking
4. Not having an address to get a bank account
I love French banks. There's no ATM fees in the whole country (actually anywhere that uses the euro), there's no transaction limits, and you get a person who you will always deal with specifically. Psst, use Caisse Epargne! Of course this comes with some confusing stuff like: having to make an appointment before opening a bank account, knowing what a RIB is (it's a slip of paper with all your banking information for direct deposit), and having an address. Opening a bank account is this strange Catch-22. To get an apartment you need a RIB from your bank, to get a bank account you need a proof of residence (and a proof of employment). I won't get into how weird I find this, because how can a homeless person open a bank account? Anyway, an address. Talk to your prof ref and get them to really love you (or just feel sorry for you) and ask them to write you a proof of residence letter. All they have to say is that you, the currently-homeless assistant, lives at their address. And voila! You've got yourself a bank account and can now find yourself a home!
CAF
CAF is the social assistance that helps you cover your rent. It can be a huge help but it is a big administrative hurricane of confusion. I'm sure every assistant you speak to will have a different horror story just as your own personal nightmare is being written. I cannot help make it smooth sailing, but maybe it can be just some choppy water sailing instead of a storm?
5. Budgeting CAF as part of my income
Do not assume you will get a single penny from CAF. Treat it as ice-cream money from grandma. Sometimes she forgets and sometimes she accidentally gives you $100 as a a pleasant surprise. Do not trust the "estimate" CAF gives you, it might give you false hope. I'm not trying to scare you here, because you will hopefully eventually get it, but it's a process. A long, gruelling process. When you do finally get it, they do give you back-pay for the previous months and it's a nice lump sum that you can go crazy with.
6. Avoiding my administrative responsibilities
If there's something I don't want to do, I pretend it doesn't exist until I have breakdown. That's obviously the opposite of what I should do and I do it to myself really, but if you cope like I do-- don't do this! It will cost you, literally. You must submit your CAF application before the calendar year ends in order to get money for that year. I didn't do this and lost 3 months of possible extra money. If you're waiting for a proof of income, like a pay stub, contact your Academie to get it if you're running out of time.
7. Not having a bottle of wine in hand when I needed to call or email CAF
If you ever want to contact them about any issue, you literally have to find the correct question on their FAQ page that might lead you to a contact email address. If not, you can always call them and pay 6 cents a minute where you are guaranteed to be put on hold for a minimum of 10 minutes, possibly hung up on a few times, asked to call back, told they can't help you, told that someone will call you back (spoiler: they never do) etc. etc. etc. Have a wine glass in one hand, phone in the other. Thank me later.
Week 1 in France
Teaching
In general, this should be fun and not too stressful. You get the fun part of being a teacher: small groups, games, less hours, no marking-- but kids will be kids and they won't always care about your activities, or they will treat it as a free period and test your limits. Don't worry about not knowing how to teach, be organized and use the thousands of free resources online and you will do just fine! There is one thing you can't find online and this was my error:
8. Not learning how to use a carnet
A carnet doesn't exist in the Canadian or American school system. It's basically a contact book between parents and the school. All important information like absences, trips, forms, etc. will be written in this book, and most importantly: disciplinary issues. If a child acts up in class, their teacher will write une observation, a note about the child's behaviour that the parents need to sign. You might feel scared to write in it, or leave the teacher to write it instead, but if you want the kids to know you shouldn't be messed with, use it! When you get to your school, ask to see the carnet and observe how teacher's use it. If your French isn't very strong, ask your prof ref how to phrase some issues you might be faced with. Show the students who's boss!
A message from one of my students; probably because I didn't use a carnet.
French
9. Getting offended when French people corrected my French
French people are incredibly kind. They know that you are learning their language and struggling, so they genuinely want to help you make it better. I think in our anglophone society, we are more gentle with our help. I definitely wouldn't ask a foreigner where their petit accent comes from. I wouldn't tell someone that they speak well but that their accent needs some work. I wouldn't tell two people who are together that one of them speaks better than the other. I wouldn't correct someone's every error. But French people do. Oh they really do. I learned that they really don't mean this maliciously, they are truly trying to help you. Something that we might see as rude, is just a friendly gesture from them. After all, you came to France to learn French, right? Just take the minor critiques and once again, drink some wine.
I hope that this can help you in some small way and eliminate cases where French life could be giving you a headache. Have fun! Enjoy your constant two week vacations and overflowing cheese boards.